November 04, 2007

Pakistani Slapstick - A Study in the Absurd

I might just make this a regular segment.

Musharraf declares a state of emergency supposedly to fight "terrorists".

Among the first places surrounded by troops was the Pakistani Supreme Court.

I present to you Pakistan's new den of terrorists:



I hear from good imaginary sources that the judges who reside herein have been responsible for links with the Taliban in the 80s, not the ISI or the Pakistani army.

Pervez Musharraf explained the decision thus:

"Kindly understand the criticality of the situation in Pakistan and around Pakistan. Pakistan is on the verge of destabilisation...

"Inaction at this moment is suicide for Pakistan and I cannot allow this country to commit suicide."


A random , hyper-ventilating Pakistani fictionally interviewed by DhakaShohor at a train station out here in the Decadent West said: "Yes, yes of course we've heard this before. *short quick breaths* From Ayub, from Yahya, from Zia-ul Huq, even from my mom and dad sometime. *short quick breaths* But THIS TIME *short quick breaths*, it's different. *short quick breaths* THIS TIME *short quick breaths* , Pakistan really is in danger from *shouting* those Muslim Fundies. Musharraf is the promised Messiah, the Philosopher-King, the Most Virile Man, the Only One who can save us! Musharraf Zindabad!"

The random Pakistani finished his sentences with the panting of a man who has just finished a 100m sprint or something more enjoyable than talking about a short, moustachioed brown man like himself. He then decided to throw himself in front of an oncoming train screaming out, "Inaction at this moment is suicide!!!"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

um, are you writing about Pakistan or Bangladesh? I thought you were describing Bangladesh in your post :)